*this post will contain amazon affiliated purchasing links as well as links to free resources

How well we’re sleeping, what we’re putting into our bodies, and how active we are can be key foundations to our mental wellness. When our sleeping is off it can feel particularly overwhelming to try and reign it back in. Anxious thoughts or impulsive scrolling can keep us awake and wired. Here are some tips to build good future sleep habits. Keep in mind, these are not all quick fixes, but a path to build long-term results that can make a vital impact in your overall stress management. I have divided this blog into a section for adults/teens with links and then another section for helping children build healthier sleep habits as well.

1 in 3 adults in the U.S. have difficulty falling asleep at night. Night is often the time that we feel the most anxious because we have limited things to distract us from our thoughts. If we reach to our phones for distraction, we are actually just keeping ourselves more awake. If we are constantly checking the clock, then we’re waking up our brains more with the rush of adrenaline that our frustration causes. These nights of tossing and turning can make us feel hopeless. So what’s a person to do?

Well, first, make plans for the long-term solution. Get yourself on a sleep schedule. This obviously won’t help you on Day 1, but starting it first will pay off faster than you realize it. This is helpful not only for management of daily stress and functioning, but also for clinical levels of Anxiety, Depression, ADHD, etc., that will work against your normal sleep patterns. Building a bedtime routine also signals to your brain to start releasing melatonin and winding down for sleep. When you have a consistent routine, just the visual of looking at your toothbrush can signal your brain that bedtime is soon. The key is to not throw your body off of its system by engaging in activities to wake it back up, so reduce and end screen time before you climb in bed. If you’re tossing and turning reach for a book, magazine, notepad, music, listen to a guided meditation, practice deep breathing and progressive muscle relaxation, or as a last resort, play an old movie you’ve seen a 100 times before. The more you try to fight your restlessness, the more the frustration of losing is going to wake you up. I know, easier said than done. Try to accept that it ‘may’ be a longer night, don’t check the clock, don’t grab you’re phone because you’re giving up, keep your room dark and cool, and grab one of those resources with the plan to lull yourself to sleep eventually.

Your sleep schedule will of course come up against changes in routine, extra curriculars, social gatherings, etc. that throws it off course for the night, but when you build in as much consistency as you can throughout the rest of the week it will greatly reduce the impact of those changes and allow your body to stay on routine for the next night.

In the evening before bed focus on minimizing your caffeine and sugar intake- remember caffeine can be in chocolate too. This is especially important with children. Also, don’t use alcohol as a means to fall asleep. You may fall asleep faster, but it will impact your quality of sleep and can cause you to feel more tired or anxious in the morning and may wake you more during your sleep. A large meal before bedtime can also impact the quality of your sleep since your digestive system is not able to shut down and allow your brain to focus on regenerative sleep and reprocessing.

Once you’re in bed, there are some tools that can help you to fall asleep. Sound machines and weighted blankets are some that my clients of all ages have seen a lot of benefits with, especially those with anxiety. Thankfully weighted blankets have become a lot more affordable and I’ve added links below (I am a paid amazon affiliate) to some for adults and children. Personally, though, if I’m splurging on self-care, a good blanket and book is where I like to look, so I’ve added a more expensive one as well.

If you are trying strategies like these and are still struggling or if you know you have an underlying issue like clinical anxiety or depression, then reach out to a mental health professional to help treat the underlying causes of your stress.

Also, I personally like to talk with clients about changing their sleep habits and maybe incorporating something like a sound machine or weighted blanket before discussing something like taking melatonin nightly. According to the National Institute of Health at the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, “the long-term impacts of melatonin use are unclear”. As a therapist I only recommend clinically-validated interventions. Sleep habit changes may take longer to see immediate results but they can produce long-term benefits that don’t require further purchases like monthly supplements. Also a good sleep habit isn’t something that you can forget to pack for a trip or run out of.

Sleep strategies for children often include the same concepts as adults but slightly modified. Making sure that your children are on a consistent sleep schedule is a major component, which of course can be hard with after school practices for them or their siblings interrupting the family routine, but if you find you spend most of your time at night trying to get them to fall asleep, it can be worth saying “no” to or leaving earlier from some obligations in lieu of getting home on time to keep their sleep consistent. That way their body can do the majority of the work for you to help them fall asleep. Also a sleep routine is a great benefit for their minds to start winding down. It is very important that their down time before bed limits screen time. Screens can reduce our natural melatonin at a time when we want it to be building naturally before bed. Play based activities before bed are not only great for sleep but also for brain development- so play a board game or have them build or create something on their own- legos, dolls, crafts, etc.

At bedtime you want to engage in naturally calming activities like reading or warm baths/showers to help promote relaxation. If you don’t have time for a full calm-down before bed because you’re rushing home from something, use that as a time to play music everyone enjoys or have a conversation about the good parts of the day. Focusing on the positives or being able to problem-solve a worry or frustration they have can set them up for an easier time falling asleep that night.

Watching food intake before bed can also have a great impact. Try to limit sugars and processed food. Nightlights may be a must in their room but try to also limit how bright they may be for a better quality of sleep. Noise machines are great if kids are easily woken or if night time sounds of the house or the neighborhood scare them easily. Children often hit a time where it is developmentally normal to become scared at night and sound machines, nightlights, weighted blankets, and stuffed animals can help with building that sense of comfort while sleeping in their own rooms. Weighted blankets for children can be a great tool for better sleep, but make sure you are buying the appropriate weight for your child’s size (websites and stores should have a calculator for their product) and I prefer ones where the outside cover can be removed to wash over some of the printed designs, but I’ve included both.

You can also use an Alexa or google to play sleep stories, soothing music, or even as a sound machine, just set how long you want it to play. Using something like an ‘OK to wake clock’ can also help younger children learn when it’s time to get up for the day or if they should be trying to fall back asleep through a colored light system.

Below are some links to products that can be useful, but are not mandatory, for setting up a good sleep environment.

If you are trying strategies like these and are still struggling or if you know you have an underlying issue like clinical anxiety or depression, then reach out to a mental health professional to help treat the underlying causes of your stress.