Trauma and Rage
When we think of someone re-experiencing their trauma, we may first picture someone who is crying or terrified-frozen with fear. Often our first thought is not someone yelling or enraged over a seemingly minor occurrence. While a history of trauma may not always be the root of these expressions of rage, it can be a factor in some. In this blog I’ll explain some of the physiological changes that trauma (especially long-term trauma) has on the functioning of our brain and our ability to regulate our emotions, even to the point of our awareness of those emotions.
When we experience a traumatic event, our fight-or-flight response is engaged and how long it stays on is often determined not merely by the length of that event, but also on our ability to respond to it the way our brain intends for us to. Remember with fight-or-flight our brain primes our body to be able to act against a threat or escape it. When we are in a situation where we are immobilized- physically or mentally- it can cause that experience to be increasingly traumatic- to our body, brain, and psyche. It is part of the difference between how survivors of the same traumatic experiences can have drastically different long-term responses. If individuals are able to physically help themselves in some way during a traumatic experience, they are less likely to suffer from the physiological effects of that experience. This is in part because those neurochemicals from that fight-or-flight response are put into use and they are not trapped in that situation while being continually flooded internally by those stress hormones and neurochemicals. Also, individuals that are able to actively respond to their needs during a traumatic event are able to keep a sense of agency. Agency is the sense that we are in charge of our lives. Our ability to react to something out of our control helps maintain that sense of agency.
When our traumatic experiences are chronic though- like a unhealthy relationship or work environment, or when they begin in our childhood like a neglectful or emotionally, physically, or sexually abusive home- then our ability to have a sense of agency or to escape or address our trauma can feel (or be) non-existent. These types of situations alter the way our brain develops in childhood as well as the way it reshapes itself throughout adulthood through neuroplasticity (the brain’s adaptations to experiences). My previous blogs have addressed some of the long-term impacts of chronic or complex trauma, so this one will focus solely on the expression of anger and rage.
Aggression can be an attempt to regain a sense of agency. Rage, though, is ultimately an inability to regulate one’s anger and that difficulty with regulation may stem from the way trauma interferes with healthy development. A constantly stimulated stress response (fight-or-flight) begins to reverse the role of the stress response. It causes individuals to be constantly hyper-vigilant and constantly scanning for or reacting to threats in their environment. This will lead to a lot of false triggers and eventually a numbness to actual threats. Then, we begin to see individuals ignore dangerous interactions or behaviors, but react in extremes to small slights or inconveniences. Trauma increases the risk of misinterpreting whether a situation is threatening as well as the degree of response needed for that situation. The effects of this constantly stimulated stress response can be numbness oscillating with irritability. Individuals can even begin to seek out unhealthy experiences or experiences that mimic their previous traumas because those intense and even retraumatizing experiences break through the numbness they had been experiencing previously.
In healthy households with healthy attachment styles, children can learn how to recognize their different emotions and how they make their body feel. Children can learn how their own actions can impact how they feel as well as how others respond to them. They can learn that their skills can grow and develop and help them achieve goals. These emotionally and physically safe environments allow them to not only build a healthy self awareness, but also to develop empathy and a desire to help others around them.
In unhealthy households with abuse, criticism, or neglect, those traits likely aren’t developed and a sense of being able to control one’s emotions or responses can often fluctuate to extremes. Children and adults can grow to ignore or avoid acknowledging their feelings due to a fear that they can not handle experiencing them or a fear of losing control. Unfortunately, we know that suppressing feelings actually increases one’s risk of “losing control” of them though because we lack the practice of managing them in smaller doses.
“The more early pain and deprivation we have experienced, the more likely we are to interpret other people’s actions as being directed at us and the less understanding we will be of their struggles, insecurities, and concerns.”
Often, traumatized individuals seek out ways to numb themselves from their emotions, their bodily sensations, and their memories through drugs or alcohol. Their brains also seek ways to numb itself, which is why dissociation is a constant with trauma. Self numbing and dissociating block our ability to learn to process and even recognize the impact that trauma has had and is currently having on our body, mind, and emotions. While it is an attempt to control our responses to trauma, it ultimately leaves us more defenseless against the long-term impacts of that trauma.
Trauma also makes it difficult for many to sense physical reactions in their body. Having so long felt unable to trust their thoughts or emotions, they learn to ignore their “gut instincts” and eventually their numbing from negative sensations or emotions leads to numbing from the positive ones as well. A lack of awareness of one’s feelings or emotions limits our ability to regulate and manage them. We miss internal cues for self care and often the health of traumatized individuals suffers.
Traumatized individuals’ brains learn to address stress by numbing to it or reacting in extremes, like rage. Anger, though, is a secondary emotion. It is fueled by other emotions like insecurities, anxieties, or even once again feeling ignored or cornered. So often traumatized individuals reacting in rage are actually unaware of what underlying trigger or feeling is actually upsetting them. That lack of awareness of their feelings and emotions that I previously mentioned creates another barrier to their ability to address those underlying triggers and regain autonomy over their body’s responses.
While the structural changes caused by trauma can explain some of the extreme reactions of trauma, it is not meant to excuse aggression and harm towards others. Traumatized individuals often lack self awareness in regards to how their reactions relate to their trauma and hopefully this blog can be a step towards recognizing the need to address one’s trauma history. Trauma doesn’t only affect those who experienced it- it impacts all the people they interact with in their lives as well. Ignoring trauma often means you are missing the ways it can continue to impact your life and prevent you from regaining a healthy control over your body and mind again.
The next blogs in this series will look at types of trauma treatment to help you regain that sense of agency as well as trauma bonding, which can keep individuals feeling addicted to unhealthy relationships. I will also be discussing the impacts of trauma on the body, brain, and development throughout the month of January. Get a head start with the other Trauma blogs or with the trauma booklets available in the storefront.
